US National Women’s Team Threatens Mass Exit Over Possible Lia Thomas Tryout

The Unsettling Prospect of Lia Thomas Joining the Team

In a surprising move, all 16 members of the US National Women’s Team have proclaimed their intention to quit should transgender swimmer Lia Thomas be given a chance to try out for the team. Thomas has gained notoriety following her victory at the NCAA Championship, in addition to setting 11 world records in swimming.

As the coach of the women’s team, Joe Barron explained, “None of these women are willing to compromise their comfort in the locker room for potential competitive advantage. They would rather win through genuine merit rather than the addition of an overqualified individual on their team.”

The Ringer Debate

A ‘ringer’ is typically referred to as an individual who is excessively qualified to compete in a certain event, generally in the realm of sports. The team’s apprehension stems from the worry that allowing a biologically male individual on their team could be seen in a negative light by the rest of the world.

However, Thomas argues that her perceived advantage is largely overstated and the reports of her dominating the sport are “extremely exaggerated,” despite the numerous records and medals she has to her name.

Response from the US Olympic Committee

Following a request for comment on the matter, a spokesperson for the US Olympic Committee responded with confusion as to why the women’s volleyball team, the featured squad in the image accompanying this article, would express concern over Thomas potentially trying out.

The spokesperson added, “I doubt she’d make it. She’s a swimmer. They aren’t known for playing a lot of volleyball.”

This reporter confirmed that throughout the history of volleyball and swimming, there’s no recorded instance where someone who’s trained in the 50-yard dash has won a medal in volleyball. This is an interesting reminder of the unique diversity of sports in the United States.